This is the official blog of Gevar, Jrome and Vaughn. We named it Ghidorah because King Ghidorah is a 3 headed dragon, and in some ways we can be a three headed beast. We chose to blog because many people were interested in our opinions and conversation that they participated in. This blog allows people to see our viewpoint and even challenge our ideas.
Time has a way of “sneaking up” on us. For the most part we fail to pay attention to what is going on. The other day, I found myself asking the question “when will things go back to normal?” Immediately after I asked this question, I had to ask myself what normal meant to me. I laughed at this question because I began to think about what became abnormal in my life. Nothing is out of place, nothing was strange, and so nothing was abnormal. So why did I say this? Why did I desire something I already had? That was the strange part to me.
The reality of it all is that I wanted to go back, backwards in time. Back when things seemed easier yet were so much more unclear. Back when I could run 3 miles without feeling like I was going to pass out after running one. Back when I could see my friends everyday. Back when I didn’t have to pay bills. Looking back on my life, things then were so easy, back then, they weren’t so much. I miss those times and I found myself longing for them because they are familiar to me now. It’s the past now. I’ve ready taken those steps and walked through those doors, but nothing in my life is abnormal right now.
I think we want to go back in life because we are afraid. The future is unclear and is full of change. Change is constant. I look on my future and I have some “fears”. I put fears in quotations because they aren’t huge fears but they are still fears. For instance, I’m not too big on enduring the pain I have to go through to get back in shape everyday. I’m afraid of rejection and failure. However, operating in fear is living in failure. I should never let my fears and negativity overshadow my progress, hopes, dreams, and goals. Wanting to go backwards to familiarity is taking steps backwards in life. There are instances when you have to back track but you only back track to regain your footing so that you can progress forward in life.
The reason I feel this fear, is mainly because I’ve brought most of it on myself. I made decisions that have placed me in the situations that I currently find myself. So I have to live with them, but that doesn’t mean that I have to live in shame. As long as I have air in my lungs, I can make amends for my mistakes and failures. I’m currently doing that, and I’m doing it with a positive mentality. So in a sense I am getting back to normal by moving forward in my life. Getting back in shape is going to hurt but the results are going to pay off. That’s hope… and hope keeps us all moving forward in life. Hope leads us to a better tomorrow.
In a previous blog, Once A Cheater!... Always A Cheater?, i touched on things that can lead to making "us"(men) cheat. Such as, "Problem is with it only taking 1-3 women to turn a man into a "Dog", like so many claim we all are" and i still stand by this statement... For most men it only takes a few women to make us "cold hearted dogs", but it can also be understood that if a guy has been scared and hasnt let go then im sorry to report "you're prolly gonna get screwed". Unfortunately today im not defending that type of nigga... cause its yo turn niggas!!!
Too many times "we" as men allow ourselves to take the hurt and pain from every TRIFLIN HO in the past, bottle it up, and use it as a reason to not let ANYBODY get close to our "heart". Which in some cases i again understand but its 2011 its time to let go... You are not helping yourself you're just spreading the pain to them to start that cycle ALL over again. The worst part of "playing the game" is you are just giving them that same pain you experienced. It's not "being a man", it's being a coward. You can't lead someone on and then leave them hanging in limbo because YOU didn't know how to let go of the heart break YOU experienced. So yea your ex cheated with your best friend, or she stepped out with your brother, or she became yo ex-girl with a girlfriend. Instead of bottling that pain up and using it as ammo we need to practice letting go. You know stop take a second and BREATH BITCH... sigh.
I think it's funny to see so many guys out here trickin off these girls but when they have a daughter they dont want a nigga to do it to her. Well POPS welcome to the world of Karma! Just because you fucked over a ton of girls doesnt mean your child will experience it, yet at the same time you can't expect it to go super great. Sometimes we just have to be real with ourselves and understand that yea we can go out and be hos. Though you can't lead someone on to think they have a reason to love you when you have a no strings attached mindset. I think at some point we have all suffered from the addiction to freedom but if you can't be real with the person(s) you're messing with then you are lying to yourself about YOUR happiness.
Growning up i think we all start as hopeless romantics(please look it up if u dont know) yet with tv, music, and the older men around us we pick up on the tricking off. Once we get that 1st taste of heart break most of us move on still hopeless romantics hoping to find happiness. Then it happens again thats when you can make the choice to keep hoping or become what you know you really don't want to be but will accept because "every otha nigga do it".
There's nothing wrong with being tough, there is something wrong with being cold. Any man that tries to say he is happy fucking every girl in sight he is lying because at the end of the day everybody wants that one body to come home to. Some front and say they don't care, yet they do. No man whats to be cheated on just like no man wants to be the "side dick", yet we treat women like they should love that position. Why continue to live up to a stereotype, when you can encourage the next young brother to do better and expect better? With life comes pain, but todays pain doesnt have to be tomorrows.
We can always look at what hurt us, what can hurt us, what will hurt us, but we have to let go. Keep it with you as a learning point but let the pain, anger, and hurt go because if you dont you are going to start that cycle withnot only the next girl but the next generation. If all men are dogs why not try to be "that nigga" that's not. Be the guy who actually does give a shit about a person enough to tell them the truth. If you have to lie to someone about being with them when you have no intentions to be that is the same as cheating. If you have a "side chick" and a "main chick" you're cheating. Basically if you have felt the pain before why spread it to everyone else? Thats just more pain for her to deal with and possibly pass on to what could have been a good nigga.
There can't be truth without care... meaning maybe you should give a shit about the people you talk to... even if its just a cut buddy, give a shit enough to atleast let them know, "hey this is all it is, if you aren't happy with it we need to move on", might seem kinda crazy but believe me its a whole lot easier and better for both parties.
