Defined

• Best Friend - the one friend who is closest to you.
• Friend - a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
• Associate - a person who is admitted to a subordinate degree of membership in an association.
• Acquaintance - a person known to one, but usually not a close friend.

Too often i hear people say, "I don't have any good girl/guy friends." For the longest it bothered me to hear this. WHY? Because, we all have friends good and bad yet the problem is not the "friend" it's how you view the status of that relationship. We tend to try to give everyone a title of "friend" when we should infact break that down to sub-categlories. Not because people can't be a good friend, instead to say not everyone SHOULD be trusted from day one. We are brought up with the belief to "love all Gods children", which i agree with but that doesnt mean everyone should be given a title to lose, rather one to gain.

With most..... better yet with all of my friendships each person has had to earn certain titles. Some titles im a little more lenient with (ex. my bro/sis's girlfriend/boyfriend), because they are close with the ones i care about most. Although, that title can fade with given relationship if one doesn't build outside of said relationship. I have been through many friendships, gained trust, lost trust, gained "family", and lost strong relationships, because thats what it tkes to find life long friends. I enjoy having the friends i have near or far because i know at the end of the day that love and support is always there. If i were to tell someone i have had the same basic core group of friends for going on 15yrs, they probably would scoff at it. Amazingly enough its true, give or take a few.

To build a strong relationship you have to build trust. (Trust - the obligation or responsibility imposed on a person in whom confidence or authority is placed.) People tend to give trust to everyone they meet, which i REFUSE to do, because they feel ts the RIGHT thing to do. I on the other hand give nothing and expect nothing until a certain status is earned. Do i have trust issues? YES. Although in m eyes that makes the relationships i have that much stronger because every ounce of it was earned in one way or another.

I find it funny we are so willing to open up to those we call friends much earlier than those we call our companions. We make companions work for every little bit and give "friends" passes on much more. Why not expect the same from both parties? How about askng yourself this? (read below)

• Are you willing to take more crap from a friend or a companion?
• Would you prefer a friend lie to you or lover?
• Do you expect more out of our friends or the one you want to spend you life with?
• Does it hurt more to a good friend or a good lover?
• Is the flaw of a friend more acceptable than the flaw of your significant other?

I ask myself those questions regularly when considering both friends and loves. I guess when you are really ready to find those life-long friends you will challenge them like you do anything you expect to be life-long. Until then you can't be mad at them because you trusted them and gave them a title they never wanted/deserved.

Love, live, laugh yall.