Apparently I don't care about all that and I'm willing to accept you the way you are.
I do realize that people make an attempt at being modest with these statements, but they come off as rather annoying to me. Just say thank you. For one it's hard enough trying to tell someone that you like them, then you hear this insecure sounding line...
Moving on...
I respect and appreciate a person that can be themselves around me. That makes me feel comfortable to be myself. It allows me to open up and let that person in to what makes me me. You shouldn't be ashamed to be yourself and if you are surrounding yourself around people that make you feel uncomfortable with yourself, then maybe you need to find some new people who are willing to accept you for who you are.
I don't know where the tendency to "down" yourself comes from (I guess the media). You should just accept the compliment when someone finds you attractive. Some people make excuses as to why you shouldn't find them attractive (which makes you unattractive, and I don't think it looks modest) and other people have to inform you of the things that you missed about their attractiveness..... This is another failure to me. Don't point out things you think I've missed about you, you could very well be setting yourself up for disappointment.
I've found myself wanting to divert attention away from myself when I receive compliments. I do it for various reasons, but the easiest thing to do is say thank you. If I don't find them attractive I just appreciate their good taste in men and move on.
If you are attractive then that's what you are. I hate that females feel like they have to be dressed up and have their face caked up with make up and what not just to feel beautiful. Beauty really does come from the inside and we men can sense your insecurities. If a man finds you attractive in your lounge clothes then accept that. That's the real you. That's the you that you feel comfortable with when no one is around looking at you and judging you. If a man can find you beautiful at your ugliest moment then, I think you may have found someone worth hanging around with.
I never really understood women who prance around in tight short dresses and make-up and whatnot just so they can grasp unneeded attention. They seem like the most insecure people to me. I never understand that. Why do you feel you have to have this to feel wanted? You are already wanted by someone who appreciates you. Someone who understand the real you and not just have a piece of you.
What's the point of rejecting the people who want to care for you and when "boo season" hits then you are left posting "lonely tweets" and randomly express your loneliness.
**"boo season" is the season when all insecure females feel lonely and have the desire to cuddle and be with someone simply because the temperature has dropped and no one really wants to be lonely around Christmas time**
The funny thing about not really embracing yourself and not wanting to be with people who are willing to embrace you is that you stay lonely. It won't matter if you are in a relationship or not because the fact that you don't want to be you or embrace all of you still leaves you lonely. Won't matter if you are married with three kids and a house on the hill, you will never really be happy. People don't focus on the right things when they are single, men or women.
Guys, we are just as insecure as women are and we can be just as emotional when things go bad. We are all humans and we all are born with emotion. I don't care how hard you act, when a women rejects you, you feel vulnerable for a second and when you start dissing her because your feelings are hurt, guess what? Yep, that's exactly what you are. Just accept the fact that your approach was weak or that she didn't find you attractive and move on.
Put your energy in picking your self esteem off the floor and not toward dissing her
I don't understand why some guys find it hard to accept that we are emotional too. I just know that if you don't express your emotions the right way you may find yourself having a break down one night in the wrong setting
Eventually the real you comes out. So you might as well put in the real work to embrace it and let people know who you are, especially the people you care about. Life is too unpredictable and why wait until you are 30 to wonder why you can't keep or find a mate? Take your singleness into stride, focus on more than hooking up and what you don't have cause at the end of the day you will always have yourself. I'd rather have a positive outlook on myself then a negative one. So I'm going to love who I am and what I have.
Peace,
VP
Vaughn, love the piece you wrote about ppl accepting who they are and embracing themselves. Many times too often people feel the need to tear down other people and make them feel bad about themselves all because they cannot accept and work through their own insecurities. I wonder what the world would be like, if ppl only worried about making themselves a better person. hmmm food for thought. nevertheless, kudos on the blog follow me @imjustcandace
ReplyDeleteYeah, it would be a different world, but sadly that idea is unrealistic. I just want to let people know that if I find you attractive then you are attractive. You don't have to jump through hoops (physically, emotionally, literally, or figuratively) to gain my attention. I don't like people who crave attention. Just want people to stop hiding their personalities in order to feel accepted
ReplyDeleteI think my problem is that I'm toooo real, but in weighing the options, I know I'd rather have too real than not real enough.
ReplyDeleteI love it.! EMBRACE YOURSELF . the theme of my work of art to be finished for the ART PRIZE 2011 in Grand Rapids Michigan Sept 21 - Oct. 9 Huntington Bank 50 Monroe. Go check it out. My whole idea came from the thought we need to EMBRACE ourselves because most people dont embrace us. Take care of you. That is # 1. I have not been doing that all my life and now its time. Thank you I like your post. I will post the finished piece but for now take a look at my other art work.
ReplyDelete